Got told my opener was 'too aggro' by a match who unmatched after I asked her out at message 3

Was that guy who leads with a direct question (you know, skipping the boring small talk) but after three women in a row said I came on too strong I switched to a casual 'how's your week been' approach and saw way more replies, so which is the lesser evil - being upfront and efficient or playing the slow game to avoid scaring people off?

3 comments

3 Comments

hugos461mo ago

Did you try just flipping it and going with the slow game for a bit to see what happens? @thomas_sanchez I had the same problem until I backed off and started with simple questions about their day, got way more replies that way.

ward.jamie1mo ago

Slow game all the way man. I tried the direct route for a week and got nowhere, soon as I switched to just asking about their weekend suddenly I was getting actual conversations going. You gotta ease people in or they'll bolt every time.

thomas_sanchez1mo agoMost Upvoted

Is it really that serious though, @ward.jamie? People aren't going to bolt unless you're coming on way too strong from the start.