3 hours without touching it sounds like a dream honestly. I was the same way, thought snake was just for the little guys but after fighting with my offset for years I finally caved and tried it with some apple chunks last month. Had to eat my words for sure.

Leaning like a half built roller coaster" is the best description ever. My deck guy forgot the joists.

Oh man, that napkin math is the real deal, isn't it? So here's my question: did that old timer also mention anything about the moisture content difference? I've heard SPF can twist like a pretzel if it's not dry enough, but DF stays put even when it's humid out. I'm wondering if that's why the big box guys push SPF so hard (maybe they just can't stock enough DF to keep up with demand). What did he say about that part of it, or was it strictly about the spans?

Has your friend ever told you about the time their bank's bot told them a check cleared, but it actually didn't? My coworker Sarah had this happen last spring. She asked the chatbot if her rent check went through, and it said "yes, all good." So she spent the money. But then her landlord called her a week later saying it bounced. When she called the bank, they said the bot was just trained to assume everything was fine unless it had data showing otherwise. The human rep actually said "yeah, we get complaints about that bot lying all the time." It made me so mad for her.

I've been using the Wahl Senior for years and it handles 8-10 heads a day without the blade getting hot... maybe stick with the old school corded stuff for heavy use.